A Generation Y's Response to 'Belonging'

Diana Butler Bass (along with others) is publishing frequently about the sociological shifts occurring in churches. She’s helped us see church growth used to be based on the formula: “Believe. Behave. Belong.”

If you believe what we believe and behave the way we behave, then you will eventually come to belong. Unfortunately, for some Protestants, this formula no longer works. 

It’s not because the variables are wrong – they’re just out of order for some of us. Instead of “Believing. Behaving. Belonging,” Bass argues it should read “Belonging. Behaving. Believing.”

This re-ordering is a way to reach those in “Generation Y” from whom belonging is crucial.

As a member of Generation Y, and as someone who works daily with future church leaders, here is my take on this ideological shift. 

Too often we’re picked on as being narcissistic, entitled and disengaged. The reality is we carry a deep longing to be held, to be fulfilled and to belong.

We’re in search of identity and therefore have created online personalities, connected to thousands over Twitter and redefined what it means to be spiritual (without being religious).

Therefore, emphasizing belonging is important, as it may just make the difference on whether or not churches lose their moral influence on those of us for whom belonging is central. 

But the motive for belonging needs to be parsed out. 

If the primary expressed purpose is to recruit us in order to increase church attendance or stabilize financial burdens, you can count Generation Y’s out.

We don’t want to belong to something just so we can contribute to numerical and/or financial growth. We want to belong to an organization that deepens, strengthens, and challenges who we are as individuals. This is why (unfairly, but perhaps rightly) we are called narcissistic.

But don’t read this as disengagement. We are, rather, disenchanted. 

We want to belong. We want meaning, purpose and hope. We care about justice, and want to participate in acts of self-sacrifice.

And we want to contribute a portion of the little money we have, but we want to know that our tithes will be used not only to maintain buildings but also to enact justice, mercy and compassion in our neighborhood and beyond.

Sure, the reality is buildings need maintenance, insurance premiums, electricity and running water. Generation Y’s understand that these are essential, but we want to know that our giving is contributing to a larger mission that shapes and informs how we maintain our church facilities.

But there are two glaring catches. 

First, the church will be inviting Generation Y’s to the table who most certainly think differently. This is ok. Church can be (and should be) a beautiful tapestry of God’s people working out their salvation – together.  

Everybody understands God differently. Everybody carries preconceived notions of what the Divine looks like. So why not share them and invite others to do the same? 

Secondly, some of the old patterns will have to change. Worship can’t be boring. Discipleship must be more in-depth. Missions must become less about raising money and sending checks and more about hands on partnerships. 

Every generation has something to offer. If churches can create space for the several generations to sit down and dream together, then the church will not die – it will thrive.

So my take on belonging is this:  Generation Y’s want it, but it has to be for something bigger than ourselves (which is going to be hard since we’re so narcissistic).  
-------
This article was originally published at EthicsDaily.com.  

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Most Difficult Parable Ever

Image
Theologian N.T. Wright finds the parable of the fig tree to be quite strange.  He says, “Jesus' warning in Luke 13 is at once amplified by this almost humorous, yet in fact quite sinister, parable of the fig tree in the vineyard.” And it is sinister.  It’s a hard pill to take.  Jesus' parable goes like this: A man has as fig tree planted in his vineyard.  One day he comes out looking for fruit on it, but there are no figs.  He says to the vineyard keeper, “Look at this tree.  For three years, I've come hoping to find some fresh figs, but what do I find? Nothing.  So just go ahead and cut it down.  Why waste the space with a fruitless tree?” The vineyard keeper replies, “Give it another chance, sir.  Give me one more years working with it.  I’ll cultivate the soil and heap on some manure to fertilize it.  If it surprises us and bears fruit next year, that will be great, but if not, then we’ll cut it down.”...
Read more

The Bird of Dawning Singeth All Night Long

Image
This Christmas I was moved by the words of Frederick Buechner.  For my last blog of the year I offer to you his wisdom rather than my own ramblings.  I hope it does for you what it continues to do for me. Frederick Buechner says in his book The Faces of Jesus: On the dark bulwark of Elsinore, Shakespeare has Marcellus and Haratio reflecting on Christ in the opening scene of Hamlet: Some say that ever ‘gainst that season comes Wherein our Savior’s birth is celebrated, The bird of dawning singeth all night long; And then, they say, no spirit dare stir abroad, The nights are wholesome, then no planets strike, No fairly takes, nor witch hath power to charm, So hallowed and so gracious is the time These lines from the first scene of Hamlet in a sense say it all.  We tend to think time is just progression . . . as moment following moment, day following day, in relentless flow, the kind of time a clock or calendar measures.  But we ...
Read more

Sacrificing Joy

Image
I have been told my biggest weakness is I take myself too seriously. I agree. But here is my dilemma: My life is filled with responsibilities and deadlines. I go to school, pastor a church, assist my seminary in their admissions process, and feel obligated to be a good friend. My school takes up twelve hours a week plus roughly twenty hours of study. I work at least 10 hours on my sermon and spend two days a week with my congregation. Fifteen hours of my week is given to the McAfee Admissions Office and every Saturday I play softball with some friends. With this schedule I am up to 57 hours of responsibility time plus two days are given to my congregants. Why do I do this you ask? Because I can. Because God is blessing me in it. Because it gives me a sense of fulfillment. All of these shape an identity for me. And I love every second of it. We are all busy people. We all know what it is like to work the extra hour or sign up for one my volunteer role. We all over...
Read more